It doesn't matter how others perceive You and the environment/circumstances around You, if You are living in your Truth - that is enough.
Live it, don't just talk it. Action speaks louder than words many times.
And as for the need to have Control in the "external", we truly can release that. If we can walk Our Own path in Truthfulness and Love from moment to moment- we feel that it is perfectly enough, we don't feel much need to go into discussions and defending mode. No one can never truly know or understand what You need more than You yourSelf/your Soul anyway - as we are individualized aspects and expressions of Source, with completely different stages of Soul journeys.
So BE the True You, live it, enjoy it, Live from Within, feel within, as a Creator Being- create with the energy from within your heart. Trust that it is perfectly enough. Trust that others will feel your authenticity and relaxed state, and if they don't that's perfectly fine.
And if we want to really open up to- and have the deepest of connection and relationship with someone - the only way to have that is complete surrender to the need to have Control, and explain, and discuss, needing of confirmation, and defend something that doesn't even need to be defended- which is YOU;) We are to open up without fear how it will be received and understood- and Feel complete Trust and be Vulnerable to the other person to be able to open up and expose our most sacred, naked- INNERMOST being- which is the way to True relationships, within True LOVE.
There is no "weakness" in true Vulnerability, there lies the true Strength of a being. In that completely relaxed mode of simply being.. and expressing/creating from the heart in all its nakedness and simplicity, without any need whatsoever to "defend" it, or feel weak because we don't know everything. Some feel weakness in not knowing "everything", we will never really know everything since there's constant expansion. We can find Strength by understanding that all we Need to know will be available to us when we need it.
This relaxed mode of complete Trust and non-fear of vulnerability will give an inner state of blissful peace, harmony, calm, and FREEDOM.
I Love You <3